Peanut

As I watched Gavin use a ride-on toy to roll/walk across the room yesterday afternoon, I reflected back on my weekend. And then as he slammed his fingers in the bib drawer for the thousandth time, I sighed and realized I will spend many more weekends in the ER with my little boy.

Friday evening, just before I got home from work, Nate and Laura were eating peanuts. Gavin started choking on something - always breathing the whole time, but definitely choking. The coughing fit passed, but he never quite got over it. When I arrived home a few minutes later, I looked at Gavin and told Nate, "Why does he look like he just got beat up?" He never quite started breathing normally, but we decided that with his ear infections and all the upside-down back whacking, maybe the kid just needed to sleep it off.

But when Gavin still wasn't breathing quite right Saturday morning, we decided it was time to visit the emergency room for the first time since we became parents (except that time I slipped in a hot tub and needed stitches on my chin). I took a shower, backed a day bag, and drove off to the nearest ER.

Note: when dealing with a potential choking, google your area hospitals - some are better equipped than, say, the nearest one.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] Sleeping through the nebulizer treatment[/caption]

Gavin flashed his happiest, wheeziest smile at the receptionist, and we were quickly admitted to the ER. Apparently though, his wheezing didn't sound like choking. Apparently his wheezing sounded more like a virus. And so started a whirlwind round of the Guessing Game. Both lungs sounded the same - BAD. Initial x-rays should both lungs to be the same size (not choking), but the left a little inflamed (virus). A second round of x-rays showed the right lung didn't compress (sign of choking), but the left lung compressed too much (sign of virus). Which is it?! A nebulizer treatment helped initially, but not enough or for long enough.

The ER doctor was stymied. As were the pediatric residents from "upstairs." The ER doctor was wary of anything more invasive than an x-ray, and didn't even have the equipment to perform a bronchoscopy on an infant anyway. He called Johns Hopkins Pediatric Hospital for a consult. We could keep Gavin where we were overnight to see if he got better (virus), and transfer him to Hopkins if he didn't (choking). OR we could just transfer him to Hopkins so their doctors could get a better opinion of the wheezing.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] Ambulance ride![/caption]

We transferred hospitals. A quick ambulance ride across town, and the Hopkins doctors were just as stymied. The doctors initially said they wouldn't do the bronchoscopy, preferring to just observe Gavin to see if he improved. But after a consult with the ENT specialists, paired with the sudden onset of the wheezing with the choking incident, they went ahead and performed the bronchoscopy - a camera to see (and grab!) any obstructions in his lungs.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] Pre-op, chewing on the IV[/caption]

Gavin was put under with general anesthesia at 5:30 pm. They quickly found a peanut blocking one lung, and fluid from a mean virus (bronchiolitis) filling the other. So his poor lungs really were taking a beating. They removed the peanut, and sucked out the fluid. Gavin was released home at 8:30 Sunday morning, with the keepsake peanut in a little tube.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="300"] Before: see the peanut?[/caption]

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="300"] After: free and clear![/caption]

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] The Peanut[/caption]

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] Post-op recovery[/caption]

So the other day when I asked if Gavin would throw me for any loops in this whole motherhood jungle thing? I was basically tempting fate.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="225"] Happy to be home![/caption]

Home

There's a house where I lived from 5th grade through high school.  Not the home I was married at - no, that home is in a category all by itself.  But this house saw all four of us kids graduate from high school and move onto college.  This house saw three grandchildren visit grandparents, aunts and uncles.  This house saw more parties than I can begin to count.  A house where I lived, and visited and returned to every year, almost every Christmas. 

My parents are moving from this house at the end of March, after 22 years.  And not just down-sizing or moving to someplace more manageable.  My parents are moving to California.  From Massachusetts.  To a place so far and so foreign.  The move has been a long time coming, as odd as that seems.  My father has been commuting to California for almost two years.  It's about time they just moved out there.  But moving?  From a house where they lived for over twenty years? 

This move, though I've known about it for a long time now, is becoming so real and so weird.  Yesterday, I booked a one-way ticket North.  Today, I booked a one-way U-Haul South.  I'm flying "home" for my mother's birthday (and one last party in her house), and driving home with a truck full of furniture that can't make the move to California.  I'll probably never see that house again.

And as much as I never really thought of that house as being special to me, I guess maybe it was my home, after all.

Pouring my heart out.

Wordless Wednesday

Good thing it's Wednesday, and I can be "wordless."  Because if you can't blog anything nice, don't blog anything at all.

Three is choosing your own outfit, even if it includes summer pants (that are deemed "too weird" through sobbing tears a few hours later).



President's Day (off) is new sneakers.


Nine months is proudly walking with a push toy (and almost four teeth).


Wearing listening ears all day is getting cocoa after dinner.


Wordless Wednesday

Winning

I started a post last week that I was winning. Winning all the things. Winning home.  Winning family.  Winning work.  Winning health.  I didn't quite get it typed up and posted, and for that I am glad.  Because I've just won a second week in a row.

On Monday, I went to the grocery store with both kids.  Gavin sat in the cart like a big kid for the second time in his life.  Laura walked beside us for the second time in hers.  With her new freedom, Laura took it upon herself to do a little meal planning.  She ran over to the leafy greens in the produce section and selected a bunch of kale for our cart.  We have never bought kale before.

Mom, we haven't tried this before but if we try it we might like it.  o_O

Stunned, I placed the kale in the cart and frantically texted my sister to find out how to cook it.  Laura ate a full leaf raw before I got it steamed.  She's eaten the rest of the bunch at dinners and lunches all week.  Did I mention she's picky?  I'm stunned.

Seeing her eat all that kale made me feel like this (I think she felt pretty awesome, too):
(Don't you eat your dinner standing on your chair?  Maybe you should.)

On Tuesday night, I sat down with Laura to make her Valentine's from a foam kit I bought at Michael's.  Laura and I did one together, carefully peeling the paper off the tiny foam bits and placing them on the heart to make an animal (Laura preferred the lions).  And then Laura took over, peeling and sticking until she had 14 Valentine's finished - all looking exactly how the kit meant them to look.  Hello age three!

Meanwhile, I've been doing really well with creating meal plans and sticking to them.  I've been eating less at all meals, in a good way.  I can button my pants again (without using an elastic band as if I were pregnant.  I'm not pregnant).  I've been running consistent 10 minute miles a few times a week.  Which is good, because I have seven (7!) weeks until I run the Cherry Blossom 10-miler.  I'm getting major milestones checked off at work.  I'm feeling confident. Healthy. Good. Able. Positive. Winning.  Winning feels great.