Detached and Unnatural

Laura plays with plastic toys, wears disposable diapers, drinks formula, and eats grocery store baby food.  I guess that means I'm an unnatural parent.

I don't "wear" my baby.  I'm not comfortable - physically or otherwise - slinging her around the mall in a piece of cloth.  I guess that means I'm a detached parent.

I'm sorry.  I don't mean to be offensive by any means, and I know none of you want to be offensive in any way either.  But my feelings get hurt a little every time I read about natural parenting, attachment parenting, or any of those other parenting styles that are so big right now.

I haven't read any books on how to be a mom.  Not one.  Maybe you think that makes me less informed.  I think it makes me rely on my own maternal instincts a little more.  You know, those natural feelings that are innate to motherhood.  If I have a question, I ask any of the wonderful mothers I am fortunate enough to know:  my mother, my husband's mother, my dearest friends.  These are my peers in motherhood.  My mentors.  So far, not one of them has led me astray.  And their advice?  Just listen to my heart, do what feels natural.  As if I would do something that felt unnatural!

Am I not raising a happy, healthy child?  Is she not independent and strong?  Is my baby less intelligent because I haven't read any books?  I don't think so.

Laura's imagination is sated.  Her bottom is dry.  Her tummy is full.  She climbs up on my lap when she wants a hug, and then climbs right back down again to play with her latest treasure.  I get down on the floor with her and play along.  For a child who is just one, barely walking and not yet talking, Laura sure does have a wonderful imagination.  Laura plays wonderful games by herself, with me, and even with the dog (a somewhat unwilling participant).

And when I look at how far my husband and I have come from our first moments meeting our beautiful daughter just over a year ago, I feel that everything we have done has been naturally and with attachment.  I am a natural parent, even if I'm not necessarily green.  I am an attached parent, even if I'm not physically attached at every moment. 

So let's give a round of applause for all the mothers out there who are raising their children the best way they know how.  With or without books, with or without ascribing to certain styles or trends.  If you are reading books, you are doing what feels natural to you.  Good for you.  Keep reading.

And truly, I don't want to hurt any one's feelings, because having your feelings hurt just sucks.  We are all doing the best we can.